Ethel and her wheelchair

Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to charge around
the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum
speed on the long corridors.

Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic the other
residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined in.

One day Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and Kooky
Clarence stepped out with his arm outstretched. 'STOP!,' he shouted in a
firm voice. 'Have you got a license for that thing?' Ethel fished around
in her handbag and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper and held it up to him.
'OK' he said, and away Ethel sped down the hall.

As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, weird Harold
popped out in front of her and shouted 'STOP! Have you got proof of
insurance?' Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a drink coaster and
held it up to him. Harold nodded and said 'On your way, Ma'am.'

As Ethel neared the final corridor, Crazy Craig stepped out in front of
her, butt-naked, and holding his 'you-know-what' in his hand. 'Oh, good
grief,' yelled Ethel, 'Not that damn breathalyzer test again!!!'